How many times do you say “no” each day?
I’ve definitely gone through phases in my life where I’ve said “no” to everything. Too much of that and you start to miss out on things. And yeah, I definitely missed out on some opportunities.
In order to try to counterbalance that, I decided to start saying “yes” to everything — especially to things I didn’t want to do or had never done before. To some people, that might seem like a quick path to misery, but it resulted in me having lots of interesting experiences that I would have otherwise never had — like wakeboarding for instance.
Cue flashback lighting fades and sparkle sound effects.
I remember waking up one morning to a phone call from a friend.
“Dude, do you want to go wakeboarding right now?” he said as soon as I answered. I had never been wakeboarding before. To be honest, I wasn’t even completely sure what wakeboarding was, but I had a clear enough mental picture to know that it wasn’t something I was interested in ever trying.
Naturally, I replied with, “Absolutely I do.”
He picked me up and we drove to a wake park. Just so we’re all on the same page, what I’m describing is essentially a giant lake with moving cables strung all around the perimeter. You strap a board to both of your feet (very similar to snowboarding), grab a handle attached to some rope, and wait near a dock until a hook on the main cable clips your rope and launches you into the water.
That doesn’t sound too complicated, right? I’ve gone snowboarding before. I’ve gone skateboarding. Wakeboarding shouldn’t be all that different.
It was a busy park, so there were lines. I had to wait for about 5 minutes before I got my turn, but I used that time to make keen observations of the posture and technique of the people in front of me who successfully got out on the water. It didn’t seem too hard — there were lots of young kids who had zero issues.
I was told to pull the handle into my hips, stand straight but relaxed with my weight on my back foot, then slowly extend my arms to chest height once I was parallel with the main cable. At the time, those instructions seemed simple and I was fully confident in my own abilities.
I made my way out to the dock. I watched the hook whip around the corner. I pulled the handles strongly toward my hips… and…
Faceplant. The side of my board dug in and the sudden surge of momentum instantly whipped my head into the water. It kind of felt like a big belly flop. I swam to the shore and got back in line.
This process repeated. Wait in line. Faceplant. Swim to shore. Five times. Then ten times. 20 times. Actually I lost track.
Several hours later, my friend walked by and asked if I had gotten out onto the water yet. He’d been out for a while and was just coming back in to take a break. I told him I hadn’t yet been successful. He encouraged me and once more gave me the requisite advice — keep the handle at your hips, put your weight on your back foot, etc.
To make a long story short, I kept at it for most of the day and eventually, I was successful. I finally made it out onto the water and it was a glorious 5-7 seconds before I faceplanted again.
So you see? I’m not very good at wakeboarding.
Wait… why was I telling this story? Oh right, right, because it was something I said “yes” to that I otherwise would have never done. It’s a story of perseverance, sheer forces of will, and spitting out lots of water. I haven’t had any real desire to go back try wakeboarding again, but it does make for a fun memory and a story to tell. My “say yes to everything” phase only lasted for a short while because it’s just simply exhausting.
I think it should be pretty obvious that too much yes can get us until trouble.
- Yes, I’d love to go to your event
- Yes, I’d love to help with your project
- Yes, I’d love to study that topic
- Yes, I’d love to teach that class
Those don’t seem like harmful statements, but they do quickly fill up the calendar. Most of us lead pretty busy lives. If we fill up our space by saying “yes” to everything, then there’s nothing left for downtime. There’s no moments to be quiet or still. To simply be.
Sometimes the goal is to just be a balanced human being — and that requires saying no to some things.
But don’t forget to say “yes” sometimes, too!
Good morning and happy Monday, friends!
I got a lot of fun things accomplished this past week. Unfortunately the interview with Penczak had to be postponed until later, but there’s other stuff to keep you entertained in the meantime!
For starters, I made a new video in the “Music for Everyone” series. This time, it’s about singing bowls! Of course, I was faced with many interruptions again while filming, so I turned those moments into a silly song on Patreon. Don’t worry, I’ll do a written version soon, too.
I also made a couple short videos. The first is a highlight from Deborah Lipp’s interview and the second is a sped up shot of making an herbal sachet.
As for writing, I put out an article on making herbal sachets and started the Summer Magick community spotlight series, the first of which features Ellen Evert Hopman.
My adventures in leathercrafting continue. I made a coaster and I’m about to make three more. I tested the design by setting a can of coke on top of it and I can confirm that it does indeed function as a coaster.
I have some other things brewing that I’m very excited about, but I’m not ready to share them quite yet. Soon, however. Soon.
We had a very fun coven day on Saturday. It started out with a pottery class at a local art shop, then we came back home and had a wonderful Ostara circle.
We’ll get our finished pieces back in a few weeks, glazed and fired. I’m excited to see how they turn out!
In mundane news, Selene and I watched the Bob Marley movie. What I learned was that I knew absolutely nothing about Bob Marley.
Cheers.
Aerik Arkadian 
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